Conversation
by ScarlettBelladonna
Summary: L/J--well, there's a teensy bit of kissing. And some innuendo. Nothing horribly bad, though.
1. beginnings

Lily looked up. "Honestly, James, you should know better than that by now."  
  
"Better than what?" he asked, feigning innocence.  
  
"Better than to try to put something like that over on me."  
  
"*Me*? Try to put something over on you? Would I do a thing like that?"  
  
"Of course you would, idiot. How long have I known you for now? Five, six years, something like that? Do you really think there are things about you that I haven't figured out?"  
  
"Maybe."  
  
"For example?"  
  
"If I told you, then you'd know, and that would defeat the purpose"  
  
"So there's only one thing, then? Aha!"  
  
"Lily! Stop it!"  
  
"Stop what, James?"  
  
"Can't I have even a shred of privacy in my personal life?"  
  
"Of course not."  
  
James made a small disgusted noise.  
  
"It's your own fault, James, having me for a best friend. You know quite well that I'm interested in simply everything."  
  
"So it's *my* fault now that you're incurably nosy?"  
  
"Of course."  
  
"Lily, that doesn't even make sense."  
  
"Do most of our conversations make sense?"  
  
"Frankly, no."  
  
"So why are you not used to them by now?"  
  
"I have no idea. I certainly should be. God knows nothing that you say *ever* makes sense."  
  
"Hateful."  
  
"Me? Hateful?"  
  
"Yes, *you*, hateful. Honestly, sometimes I wonder why I put up with you at all."  
  
"You know you like it.."  
  
At this point, Sirius wanders by."And how is my favorite little married couple today?"  
  
"***Sirius!*** You know quite well we're not involved like that."  
  
"Really, Lily. Huh. You certainly could have fooled me."  
  
"Sirius, what *are* you going on about?"  
  
"You two. You're acting more married than my grandparents."  
  
"We're not."  
  
Sirius raised one eyebrow.   
  
"Sirius, we *are* *not*"  
  
He raised his other eyebrow.  
  
"You do know that half of Hogwarts thinks you're James' one-woman harem?"  
  
"Harem?!? HAREM?!?!?!?!"  
  
"Lily, please..."  
  
"James! You let them think I'm your harem?!?!?!?!?!?!"  
  
"I've never said anything to make them think....."  
  
"But he's never said anything to make them think you weren't"  
  
James shoots Sirius the Look of Doom.  
  
"James!!! How could you?"  
  
"Sirius, don't you think you've caused enough trouble here for one day?"  
  
"Oh. Er, right. I'll be leaving, then. See you tomorrow, Lily."  
  
"Provided he lives that long. Look, Lily...."  
  
"Well, this explains quite a bit, then, doesn't it?"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Why I've had hardly any social life over the last year....the whole school thinks I'm your HAREM."  
  
"I think we need a word besides 'harem', okay?"  
  
"Fine. The whole school thinks I'm your girlfriend."  
  
"Well, that's sort of true, isn't it?"  
  
"In the sense that I'm your friend, and I am, in fact, a girl? Yes."  
  
"You know what I meant. And Lily, if you're going to have the name, you might as well play the game."  
  
She looked up at him, confused.  
  
He bent down to kiss her. Her eyes closed, and she found herself wrapping her arms around his neck.  
  
And that's how Sirius found them when he finally deemed it safe to return.  
  
  
A/N - Entirely true story. Almost verbatim. Names have been changed to protect the innocent. And also because I think it's a cute way for Lily and James to get together. Granted, I'm extremely biased. (Sincerest Thanks to Arth.....I mean, Sirius.)   
  
Disclaimer: Lily, James, Sirius and Hogwarts belong to the inimitable J.K. Rowling. The plot is mine, and I dare anyone to steal it from me, as I'm very protective of this particular turn of events. 


	2. changes?

Sirius peeked his head around the corner, and almost fell over when he saw James and Lily. Although he'd expected the fight to be over by now, he certainly hadn't expected this. Lily and James...kissing. It was all too bizarre. He might tease them as the most "married" couple he knew, but to actually have them together? Oh, no, now they were going to get all mushy, and wrapped up in each other, and...and...*cute*. Just then.....  
  
"Ow! James!"  
  
"Mmmm?"  
  
"You bit me!!"  
  
"I didn't!"  
  
"You did! Idiot. You don't *bite* people when you kiss them."  
  
"Thank you, oh fountain of knowledge. I knew that actually."  
  
"Well, obviously you need to work on applying that knowledge....look, you drew blood!"  
  
"I thought you were tasting kind of salty."  
  
"So you're some kind of vampire now, drinking my blood? That's gross."  
  
"Well, if it was so terrible....."  
  
"Stupid little boy."  
  
"Stupid? I'm stupid? And who are you calling little boy? Need I remind you that I'm both older *and* taller than you? Show some respect for your elders!"  
  
"My *elders*??? James, you're my 'elder' by a week."  
  
"That counts."  
  
"It doesn't. And you're not *that* much taller, either."  
  
"Four inches!!"  
  
"Yes, but I'm tall for women, and you're short for men."  
  
"Still taller than you."  
  
"Pathetic comeback from a pathetic little runt"  
  
"You're evil, you know that?"  
  
"I'm not"  
  
"You are."  
  
"Not entirely. I haven't stolen any souls or anything lately."  
  
"I wouldn't put it past you"  
  
"I only accept souls which are freely given. And anyway, what would I do with it once I had it?"  
  
"Eat it?"  
  
"Oh, that's *lovely*, James Potter. I certainly wouldn't want yours."  
  
"Too bad. It's a lovely soul. Nutmeg flavored."  
  
"You have a nutmeg flavored soul?"  
  
"Yes. Why?"  
  
"I don't know...it's oddly appropriate, though. What would I be?"  
  
"Hmmm....lemon Napoleons."  
  
"Lemon Napoleons?"  
  
"Yes. They start off hard and sour......"  
  
"Hey! James!"  
  
"If I may continue? But then when you get to the middle, they're all gooey and sweet."  
  
"Gooey and....ooh...."  
  
"Glad we've agreed. Now, if we could possibly...?"  
  
"If we could possibly....? Oh. You won't bite me again?"  
  
"Well, I do really like lemon Napoleons......."  
  
"Idiot."  
  
Sirius smiled. They may be more than just friends to each other, but they were definitely still James and Lily.   
  
A/N--Because things continue to happen....(and Kim, I'm sorry Sirius doesn't play a bigger role in this. I haven't seen the person I'm modeling him on in almost three weeks, so I've run out of "him" kind of things to put. I promise as soon as I see him he'll have a bigger part.)  
  
Disclaimer : Once again, the characters are the inimitable J.K Rowlings's, and the dialogue is mine (and Jack's, but I don't think he'll mind).  



	3. and the future?

Sirius cleared his throat.  
  
"Am I invited?"  
  
Lily and James sprang apart like they were on fire.  
  
"Er...invited to what, Sirius?"  
  
"The wedding, of course."  
  
"Sirius, darling, have you gone entirely mad?"  
  
"Not entirely, Lily, *darling* ."  
  
"Then what *are* you talking about?"  
  
"You."  
  
"Me?"  
  
"And James."  
  
"James and me? We're not getting married! James was just trying to....er..."  
  
"Er..."  
  
"What? Get a fishbone out of your throat?"  
  
"Siri-us!"  
  
"Ja-ames! You know that whining is incredibly unattractive, don't you?"  
  
"I'm not whining. Anyway, I don't care what you find attractive."  
  
"That, my friend, is fairly obvious. However, I think Lily will agree with me on this one."  
  
"I don't care what Lily finds attractive, either."  
  
"Ah. I see. So that would explain the hair combing debacle, wouldn't it?"  
  
"The hair combing debacle? James combs his hair?"  
  
"Believe it or not, he *does*"  
  
"Does is help at all?"  
  
"It would seem not. Let's hope your children don't inherit his hair."  
  
"Dear God, yes."  
  
"We're having children now? You know, the last time I checked, all I'd done was kissed her."  
  
"And?....James, are you saying you *don't* want to have children with Lily?"  
  
"Not exactly...."  
  
"So you *do* want children with her?"  
  
"That's not what I meant."  
  
"Aha. I understand. You just want to marry her and live a blissful child free life filled with lots of..."  
  
"GAAHH!"  
  
"James, love, what was *THAT*?"  
  
"Hah! Lily, you just called James 'love'!"  
  
"Sirius, I call everyone that. I've called *you* that."  
  
"You haven't."  
  
"I use pet names all the time."  
  
"But not *love*. James, she's got it bad for you."  
  
"Oh for heaven's sake. Anyway, back to the question. James, what *was* that?"  
  
"It was a "Gaahh" of frustration."  
  
"Oh, is Jamesie *frustrated*? Well, I guess I should go so Lily can take care of that."  
  
"Take care of it?!?!?! I'm not *taking care* of anything. And I don't care if he's frustrated."  
  
"You don't care if I'm frustrated?"  
  
"GAAHH!"  
  
"Oh, look, now Lily's frustrated, too. James, this is when you make the move."  
  
At which point Lily and James tackled Sirius.  
  
  
A/N--Alright, I admit it, this one was odd. My life is odd. Please let me know where you want this to go, as I'm thinking I'm going to have to abandon the real life aspect (real life is just too weird). So I'm taking suggestions.  
  
Disclaimer--Lily, James and Sirius belong, as always, to the inimitable J.K. Rowling.   
  



End file.
